So you picked up the phone and made the appointment to have some counselling. You have taken the first steps to making some changes in your life. And now you’re sitting in front of the Counsellor and you are wondering what to say.
Does this sound familiar? Maybe not. Some clients are quickly comfortable in counselling and know exactly how they want to use the time and what they want to get out of it. That’s great.
Others, however, are unsure about how counselling might work and wonder how the person sitting opposite them is going to be able to help. I remember feeling like this and I didn’t like it one bit. I felt uncomfortable and exposed and wanted to run for it as far away as possible. Some clients ask me if how they ‘are’ in counselling is normal. That assumes there is a ‘normal’. It’s really hard to write about what to say in counselling because that assumes there is a right answer. And the truth is there isn’t. Your counselling experience is going to depend on you. If you are someone who finds it hard to trust others then it may take some time before you trust your Counsellor. You might even test your Counsellor by telling them some things to see if they are shocked, before moving on to talking about the things that are buried away. The things that keep hurting you.
Based on my experiences (in both chairs) I would say that if you don’t know what to say then tell your Counsellor. Ask for help. That’s why you’re there. If it’s not forthcoming then maybe you’re sitting in front of the wrong person.